This holiday season is sucking more and more each week. No one really changes, ever, and everyone really is all the same. I've worked, but I still don't deserve what I have. I'm trusted, but I distrust even my closest of comrades. I'm funny, but I hardly ever laugh.
And each week I grow more and more unsure of my position in my life.
Fucking school, fucking assholes, fucking bullshit. And I obviously never learned not to curse.
I'm tired, guys. I'm really fucking tired. Now off to make merry for others who do nothing in the world to make merry for me.
other than being really low on money, and basically being pissy in my homelife situation, I'm doing well.
I want to say congrats to Jed on Grad school.
Congrats to Cellie, again and again, on her upcoming wedding. If I can do anything to help let me know.
Um... not much going on ok
So I'm finally enrolled in school and am so super fucking excited about it i'm kind of obnoxious to be around. English 102 and Art. Okay so it's not grad school, like most of my friends who were good children that didn't take a two year break from college, but it's a start. I'm on my way to being who I want to be and I'm so fucking happy.
Yahoo is creeping me out. They have this little thing on the mail homepage and it's this picture of a guy in a plaid blazer... and he looks like the actor that plays Sylar. Creeps me out. Like when I log into my email Sylar is reading them, too. ::shivers::
I was at a friend's concert tonight at Infusion. The band played too loud, but I was really amused by the cool artwork on the walls. I was getting more and more into the art as I looked over the paintings- they were amazing and picasso-esque.
So there was a little card underneath one. It explained that these were reproductions. That Picasso made them for a film, and destroyed them after it was finished filming because he wanted these specific paintings to exist in that film only. Ever. I was suddenly filled with so much rage that I wanted to puke. I wanted to cry. I was so fucking moved it wasn't funny. How awful- this artist's wish was for these paintings to exist inside someone else's art only. That's it. That's how he wanted them. He didn't want real copies and some untalented asshole who wanted to leech off of someone else's success hunted down this obscure film and watched it a billion times just so he could recreate something that the original artist wanted dead? What a loser and a dumbfuck. I know that it's not that bad but in Abby FlybyNight, that play I did about the crazy artist, she has this line about destroying art. It's like, something about how maybe the best art is for a moment and then destroyed- it's beautiful, rare and original because hardly anyone sees it. Maybe Picasso wanted that, too, and now some ass has disobeyed specific instructions because he wants people to ... see what? How good a copycat he is?
Out of the mist I rise, posting some crazy random shit, making you remember in the harshest way possible that I still exist. You wanted to forget, pretend I never happened, but like that cold sore on your upper lip I am persistent.
In other news, I need luck again if anyone can spare it.
I changed my myspace. I deleted gem_oddfellow. If you want to myspace me, please go to http://www.myspace.com/naked_dollie_designs (or type in firstname.lastname@example.org). It looks like a business page, but it isn't, mon amies.
I need to go on yet another job interview in a few minutes. Just wanted to let my kiddies know I am alive.
peace out! -Meg- the former and sometimes still wicked Gem
Just wanted to let you know that links on my links page on gemoddfellow.com do work now. We figured out the error. So everyone I promised to link to is now up- including Gary Gustin, the actor playing Gonzoles, Critical Hits (for Vince), 99 Burning (check the awesomeness of Czerkies), and Threadbanger.com.
PS- if you've got a cool project or website you want linked, let me know. I'll add them! love gem again
Edit I've got to say, as a sidenote that I forgot to post, that I love this city. We were driving through the Temple U. area of Philly and I look over and spray painted onto a pillar of concrete was a stencil of The Fonz's head. I wanted to stop and worship the greatness that is the Fonz and Happy Days. Love gem
I'm an idiot. ^_^ I decided that yesterday during one of the busiest shifts of the week that I was going to wear high-heeled platform mary janes. You've seen me in these shoes, they are one of my favorite pair of heels. They are black mary janes that have a thick high heel that might as well count as a platform even though they are heels. But I figure the heeled boots I'd been wearing had hurt so bad and I had worn those mary janes to college before with successful results, I figured I'd be okay.
Not so much. Even walking today has been like a chapter of the original little mermaid tale- where every time she walks it feels like a thousand knives are sticking into each foot. I wish I were exaggerating, but I am not. So we did go shopping/thrifting to find me new work shoes.
Here is what I came home with: 1 pair of way cool riding boots (that can be worn to work) 1 pair of flats for work 2 pairs of perfect fitting Levi's jeans, size 12 1 Aerosmith Tshirt 1 Marcy Playground CD 2 books (vampire novel and a romance novel) 1 polka dotted motorcycle styled blazer Dino stickers for my room moon stickers for my room 2 packages of beads from the dollar store
not to mention new dishes for the kitchen and a few things to recon to sell. All for under $60 bucks. God I love not having sales tax on clothes.
I know because some of you have my myspace and facebook that you get this a lot, but I've gotta tell my LJ only friends, too. I feel like someone has plugged me in and I just can't stop working. I mean, certain negative things going around have inspired me to do well, but that's not all of it. I have put in holy shit amount of time on these projects, it's been ridiculous. The first thing I did when I moved in was plug up my sewing machine! Within a week I was updating etsy. Then I did avatars, finished Preaching to Angels and published that, I've already written eleven parts of Waltzing with Demons, four of which are published. I've created GemOddfellow.com, my myspace and facebook, and I've joined so many tribes just to try and get the word out there it isn't even funny. I have worked and worked and worked trying to network and publicize this movie, because I honestly believe in it and what it stands for, and I can't stop thinking. The other day at work instead of reading a book I made a list of stuff I hadn't done that I could be doing to promote this flick!
So now there is CyberPunkArts.etsy.com. Yes, I came up with the idea for an etsy account dedicated to clothing inspired by Cyberpunk Opera and Dub for Babylon to help balance the cost of the movie. Paul even gave me permission to use his stencil for a few of the shirts. The shirts are pretty reasonably priced for handpainted tees and stuff. Just please, I implore you, help us out. I've worked too hard for this not to work. Off to the drawing board to figure out more stuff.
You know, I'm tired and I've got a cold, but I've never felt better before in my life.